3 Days until the big day! I'm insanely anxious because I don't really have anything to do and I had preemptively taken the entire week off of work just in case I had a million things left to do. So I've been cleaning the house and packing/ re packing our bags for the weekend and finding the minutiae to do around the house.
We've been relatively drama free, no major Bridezilla moments... unless you ask my Mom. For some reason my mom has it in her head that I am stressing out beyond belief about this wedding. I did have a little freak out when I went to pick up my 2nd dress at the shop and they told me they already gave it to someone (if you showed up at a dress shop to pick up a wedding dress and it wasn't there, would you freak out a little? Indeed) but it turns out they gave it to my mom when she was there picking up my sister's reordered bridesmaid dress. I think I had a valid reason to get upset... and I didn't get upset at the lady at the shop, I just tried to get to the bottom of what had actually happened. Note to bridal salons: DON'T give the bride's dress to anyone but the BRIDE unless the BRIDE tells you that someone else will be picking it up. That's what made me mad- I had no idea my mom picked it up and they didn't actually know she was my mom, they just saw she was picking up the bridesmaid dress for my sister and OFFERED to give her my gown as well. I think that is insane.
Anyway, what I've had a bigger freak out over is my sister. I love my sister to death. She has a tendency to be irresponsible and a total ass. Case in point: She told me that she would be the designated driver for my bachelorette party. I thought that was pretty awesome and she even paid for a bunch of the bachelorette party favors and decorations and made cupcakes. This seemed to show that she was being responsible and awesome, but then the night in question happens and my other friends tell me that they think she is way to drunk to drive so one of my other friends had to drive us home. We made it safely and I didn't get mad at my sister because those things happen, but since that was something she volunteered to do I am a little miffed.
Secondly, my mother informs me last night that my sister won't be at the rehearsal dinner. Let me say that again... My Sister. Won't be at. The REHEARSAL DINNER. WHAT? BF and I have had our wedding and rehearsal dinner dates and time since JANUARY. Everyone involved in our wedding has had at least 7 months notice as to when they needed to be available for the rehearsal dinner and for the actual wedding. I even asked my sister last month if she had requested the days off for the dinner and for the wedding and she said yes. Apparently she did not and has to work during the dinner. I'm not worried about her not rehearsing because, let's face it, it's not that difficult to walk down an aisle and stand there. What I am pissed about is that this is a bridesmaids duty to be at the rehearsal and the wedding ON TIME and to make things easier for the bride. Am I totally wrong here? Also, I want my family at the rehearsal dinner!
My mom says I'm overreacting, but I think it's just plain rude to totally disregard your bridesmaid duties, especially when we gave everyone MONTHS of advanced notice. My parents keep telling me not to stress about it, but I'm not stressed I'm just angry that again my sister can't be a responsible adult and manage her schedule properly.
This whole thing boils down to the fact that I hate having to accommodate my sister ALL THE TIME. It's been this way our whole lives. She doesn't plan ahead and doesn't manage things very well and then expect people to accommodate her or to bail her out of her problems... which my family does for EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. I want her to know that it is not ok to flake out on her responsibilities and that she needs to figure it out! What do you guys think?
My opinion is that I have a right to be upset about this; I'm not letting it ruin anything but I think my sister needs to know that she is letting me down and that it is not ok.
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
Wednesday, September 19, 2012
This Week's Lessons
Oh the things you learn in life! Or, really, the things you learn while trying to be proactive about having to change your name a million different places because you are getting married.
Why is it so hard to change your name? Getting married is the easy part and saying you have a new name is cake, but then trying to get everyone to change your last name in their system is one giant headache.
There are some things that I cannot change my name on until after I have the certified copies of our marriage license like my drivers license, social security card and bank/credit card accounts. But in the spirit of being organized and ready to be married I found a few things at work that I could start the process of changing my last name before I had said license. So that's what I aimed to do.
On Monday I notified work and submitted the proper forms to have my email changed and my login account information changed to my new name. They asked when I would like the change to take effect since while they change it I will not be able to login to any systems at work. I said this coming Friday after business hours would be great and they said perfect! And everything was perfect until this morning. I came into work and found that I couldn't login to my email, so I called our help desk. The help desk researched what was going on and found that my email and login information had actually been changed super early this morning and they had not, in fact, waited until Friday. Fine, I thought, this works too! But no, it did not. Because they prematurely set up my new email and login, they deleted my old profile... the same profile with which I access pretty much every other system that I need to work in during the day. That means that no matter how hard I tried I could not get anything done because my old login was now defunct and my new login was not yet in the system.
I've spent quite a chunk of my day so far on the phone with various departments trying to get my old/new information updated and corrected so I can actually DO SOME WORK. This also means that I cannot track my actual work hours either, which may end up impacting my pay unless they get it fixed before I'm out of the office for a week. I'm sure they will, but I'm a little worried right now! Don't worry, I'm keeping notes on my hours worked so that when I can access the system again I can update my hours.
They make this quite hard on those of us who choose to change our names.
So this week I've learned the importance of waiting to do things until they actually have to be done because sometime proactivity isn't helpful.
Why is it so hard to change your name? Getting married is the easy part and saying you have a new name is cake, but then trying to get everyone to change your last name in their system is one giant headache.
There are some things that I cannot change my name on until after I have the certified copies of our marriage license like my drivers license, social security card and bank/credit card accounts. But in the spirit of being organized and ready to be married I found a few things at work that I could start the process of changing my last name before I had said license. So that's what I aimed to do.
On Monday I notified work and submitted the proper forms to have my email changed and my login account information changed to my new name. They asked when I would like the change to take effect since while they change it I will not be able to login to any systems at work. I said this coming Friday after business hours would be great and they said perfect! And everything was perfect until this morning. I came into work and found that I couldn't login to my email, so I called our help desk. The help desk researched what was going on and found that my email and login information had actually been changed super early this morning and they had not, in fact, waited until Friday. Fine, I thought, this works too! But no, it did not. Because they prematurely set up my new email and login, they deleted my old profile... the same profile with which I access pretty much every other system that I need to work in during the day. That means that no matter how hard I tried I could not get anything done because my old login was now defunct and my new login was not yet in the system.
I've spent quite a chunk of my day so far on the phone with various departments trying to get my old/new information updated and corrected so I can actually DO SOME WORK. This also means that I cannot track my actual work hours either, which may end up impacting my pay unless they get it fixed before I'm out of the office for a week. I'm sure they will, but I'm a little worried right now! Don't worry, I'm keeping notes on my hours worked so that when I can access the system again I can update my hours.
They make this quite hard on those of us who choose to change our names.
So this week I've learned the importance of waiting to do things until they actually have to be done because sometime proactivity isn't helpful.
Monday, September 17, 2012
I'm Almost a Mrs....
That is so strange. I am so excited to be marrying my best friend and frankly, the best person I know on this earth, but I'm a little sad that I'll be losing my "maiden" name. (Quick side tangent, stay with me here: Have you ever stopped to think about the phrase "maiden name"? Because I did this weekend and when I actually gave it some thought I had quite a literal picture pop into my head of a young maiden who all of a sudden is an old maid. Anyone else? ... nope? Just me? Ok then.)
It's not that I'm super attached to my name... it's not a bad name at all, I just never really gave it any serious thought beyond this is my name and it connects me to my ancestors and identifies me from other Heathers out there. And now all of a sudden I'm like how do I preserve my maiden name so it doesn't get lost for time and all eternity!? Don't get me wrong, I definitely want to take BF's name, but I'm waxing nostalgic about my own last name. I'm contemplating getting my family crest in a necklace or ring to wear... or maybe a new tattoo is in order?
Also, it is already raising issues at work. Because I am taking time off before the wedding I requested a new name plate and a name change on our roster so that when I return it'll already be done. We abbreviate most people's names around here and on our upcoming conference roster we have everyone's initials next to their conference responsibilities. In a meeting the other day one of my coworkers was talking about how we've divided up the work and then paused mid sentence for a few seconds and then continued with, "I see that we've given H.F. a few things to do, but I've never met them! Who is that?". Followed by the silence of me not realizing that those were MY initials and that we had already changed my name on this list as well.
But really everything is going well and BF and I have finished the last of our little "to do's" before the wedding so we are literally just waiting to get to the wedding and be married.
11 Days!
It's not that I'm super attached to my name... it's not a bad name at all, I just never really gave it any serious thought beyond this is my name and it connects me to my ancestors and identifies me from other Heathers out there. And now all of a sudden I'm like how do I preserve my maiden name so it doesn't get lost for time and all eternity!? Don't get me wrong, I definitely want to take BF's name, but I'm waxing nostalgic about my own last name. I'm contemplating getting my family crest in a necklace or ring to wear... or maybe a new tattoo is in order?
Also, it is already raising issues at work. Because I am taking time off before the wedding I requested a new name plate and a name change on our roster so that when I return it'll already be done. We abbreviate most people's names around here and on our upcoming conference roster we have everyone's initials next to their conference responsibilities. In a meeting the other day one of my coworkers was talking about how we've divided up the work and then paused mid sentence for a few seconds and then continued with, "I see that we've given H.F. a few things to do, but I've never met them! Who is that?". Followed by the silence of me not realizing that those were MY initials and that we had already changed my name on this list as well.
But really everything is going well and BF and I have finished the last of our little "to do's" before the wedding so we are literally just waiting to get to the wedding and be married.
11 Days!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Waking Up to Fall
This weekend was a strange one, in weather terms at least. It was summer-warm and then autumn-cool; it rained, then shined, then sprinkled, then shined, then 5-minute-thunderstormed, then sun again. But in the midst of the weather-mania is a constant that I'm starting to remember- cool evenings and changing leaves. I'm totally excited.
I LOVE Fall. I say it every year, and every year it becomes truer and truer. This year especially so. I find myself pining over the cozy sweaters and tall boots that are daily being presented in store windows and shelves. I am craving soups and stews and searching for new recipes to bolster our old favorites. I am itching to bake some fragrant goodies and I'm perusing the craft and decor websites for new items to add to my collection. My mind wanders frequently to Halloween costume ideas, possible seasonal party opportunities and how in the heck I can make my house look like Hogwarts without my neighbors and friends thinking I've totally lost my mind.
Also, we are getting married in 18 days. I'm more excited each day! Just a few small details left to nail down (like actually putting the center pieces on the tables the day of the wedding) but we are set! This coming weekend I have my trial run hair and make up. She said it could take 4 hours... but will be much faster the day of. I have never just sat for 4 hours so this will be interesting. I had the hardest time finding a lipstick since I don't wear a lot of make up normally; who knew that that would be my most manic point in this whole wedding thing so far. I did happen to find an absolutely awesome mascara (not all natural and eco-friendly like I normally like to use) at Sephora- Diorshow Black Out Waterproof mascara. Boy-Howdy is it waterproof! I tested it on Saturday and it is BLACK BLACK BLACK. It didn't smudge or flake off at all even though I was running all over town and got a little sweaty doing yard and house work in the afternoon. It did not come off with my regular face wash, so I slept with it on (after washing the rest of my make up off; I will need to get a heavy duty eye make up remover for this stuff!) and woke up sunday looking like I had just put the mascara on. Totally perfect for a possibly-teary wedding day!
What are your favorite things about Fall?
I LOVE Fall. I say it every year, and every year it becomes truer and truer. This year especially so. I find myself pining over the cozy sweaters and tall boots that are daily being presented in store windows and shelves. I am craving soups and stews and searching for new recipes to bolster our old favorites. I am itching to bake some fragrant goodies and I'm perusing the craft and decor websites for new items to add to my collection. My mind wanders frequently to Halloween costume ideas, possible seasonal party opportunities and how in the heck I can make my house look like Hogwarts without my neighbors and friends thinking I've totally lost my mind.
Also, we are getting married in 18 days. I'm more excited each day! Just a few small details left to nail down (like actually putting the center pieces on the tables the day of the wedding) but we are set! This coming weekend I have my trial run hair and make up. She said it could take 4 hours... but will be much faster the day of. I have never just sat for 4 hours so this will be interesting. I had the hardest time finding a lipstick since I don't wear a lot of make up normally; who knew that that would be my most manic point in this whole wedding thing so far. I did happen to find an absolutely awesome mascara (not all natural and eco-friendly like I normally like to use) at Sephora- Diorshow Black Out Waterproof mascara. Boy-Howdy is it waterproof! I tested it on Saturday and it is BLACK BLACK BLACK. It didn't smudge or flake off at all even though I was running all over town and got a little sweaty doing yard and house work in the afternoon. It did not come off with my regular face wash, so I slept with it on (after washing the rest of my make up off; I will need to get a heavy duty eye make up remover for this stuff!) and woke up sunday looking like I had just put the mascara on. Totally perfect for a possibly-teary wedding day!
What are your favorite things about Fall?
Tuesday, September 4, 2012
24 Days
WHAT?! I'm getting married in 24 days. This is starting to get real, you guys.
Ok, so I feel like I need to play a little catch up because I haven't been posting regularly. Here's what we've been up to:
1. BF got a full time teaching job for this year! YAY! He starts teaching the 4/5 blend class at Atkinson Elementary. We are so excited, but a little stressed out. BF spent most of last week cleaning his class room, trying to get his supplies in order and planning out his curriculum and lesson plans. FUN. But we are grateful that he has a full time permanent position.
2. BF got a new (new to us) car! Woohoo! We knew we were outgrowing BF's car when we moved into the new house and started making frequent trips to Home Depot and Lowe's. He started looking around a few months ago and decided that he didn't want another small car, but rather like Honda Elements. They stopped making them a year or so ago, so he's been looking at used ones. We found a couple we liked, so went for a test drive with one and BF decided that was it! He's sad to sell his car, but happy that we will have a larger vehicle.
3. We got our marriage license. It was kind of boring, but it made things feel more real and official!
4. I figured out how I want to style my center pieces for the reception and ordered all of the vase fillers and flowers to go in them. Expensive and time consuming, but insanely more affordable than having a florist do them. There is no way I'm spending more than what the food costs for center pieces, which is why we are doing them ourselves ahead of time.
5. I learned how to Kayak. Yesterday, being the Labor Day holiday, my parents decided they wanted to go to the lake. I've never been kayaking and got to try it for the first time yesterday. It was so much fun! I think BF and I need to invest in a couple of kayaks and go regularly. What an ab and arm work out!
In a nutshell, that's what we have been up to. I getting super distracted and can't even write a full post without switching over to browse at Bridesmaid gifts. 24. Days.
Ok, so I feel like I need to play a little catch up because I haven't been posting regularly. Here's what we've been up to:
1. BF got a full time teaching job for this year! YAY! He starts teaching the 4/5 blend class at Atkinson Elementary. We are so excited, but a little stressed out. BF spent most of last week cleaning his class room, trying to get his supplies in order and planning out his curriculum and lesson plans. FUN. But we are grateful that he has a full time permanent position.
2. BF got a new (new to us) car! Woohoo! We knew we were outgrowing BF's car when we moved into the new house and started making frequent trips to Home Depot and Lowe's. He started looking around a few months ago and decided that he didn't want another small car, but rather like Honda Elements. They stopped making them a year or so ago, so he's been looking at used ones. We found a couple we liked, so went for a test drive with one and BF decided that was it! He's sad to sell his car, but happy that we will have a larger vehicle.
3. We got our marriage license. It was kind of boring, but it made things feel more real and official!
4. I figured out how I want to style my center pieces for the reception and ordered all of the vase fillers and flowers to go in them. Expensive and time consuming, but insanely more affordable than having a florist do them. There is no way I'm spending more than what the food costs for center pieces, which is why we are doing them ourselves ahead of time.
5. I learned how to Kayak. Yesterday, being the Labor Day holiday, my parents decided they wanted to go to the lake. I've never been kayaking and got to try it for the first time yesterday. It was so much fun! I think BF and I need to invest in a couple of kayaks and go regularly. What an ab and arm work out!
In a nutshell, that's what we have been up to. I getting super distracted and can't even write a full post without switching over to browse at Bridesmaid gifts. 24. Days.
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